They all will not agree with you sir, ma’am Leader.
Some of the most defining moments in your career as a leader suggest that it’s the end of the road for you. Not so.
You’ve probably all heard the phrase “what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger”? Can I tell you that in leadership, what’s designed to kill you can definitely do just that, because it’s designed to.
I’ve gone through several bad seasons of leadership, all of which sharpened my vision and the capability to see clearer. Some I even brought on myself by bad choices and decisions based on emotions rather than the intellect and discernment of right from wrong. Oh yah, you’ve been there! Did it make me stronger? Maybe. Did it wake me up? Most definitely! Do I want to go through it again? Not necessarily.
It’s not the event itself that makes you stronger, but the ability to identify what’s actually out to get you, and to be able to disengage it before it destroys you and those connected with you.
Assigning value to fixing the problem rather than focusing on the problem is characteristic of growth and maturity in leadership. Weighing the consequences of the “have to’s” verses the “want to’s” is part of the solution.
The way you approach closing doors is simple: if it’s meaningful and time for you to walk through it, it will remain open, and shut only after you’ve safely passed through. If the door shuts quickly in your face, it’s not for you. Never ever run to the door that’s closing. You could get hurt which takes years to recoup from mentally, and spiritually.
All to often, the feeling we gather from our own frail attempts to lead, those of failure and complacency, suggest that we need to restructure in order for something new to take place in our lives. Sometimes we just need to be observant to the things around us. Instead of spending so much time looking, we should take on the act of seeing instead. Looking at something or someone tends to lead towards judging. We assume, become abrasive, and completely substantiate our directives as leaders. Not all the time, mind you, but in most cases. Seeing helps balance us between the facts, and the false.
Making decisions while leading is complex. There’s too many layers in the decision itself, not to mention us as leaders…we are as complicated as it gets. We choose to be somewhat charismatic in most situations, but in reality, we take on a “Teflon” like coating, protecting us from the retaliation and dislikes of our decisions. It’s our built in fire-wall.
The end result of that all important decision, whatever it may be, will be targeted by the nefarious and naysayer types, that’s a given. But here’s the important lesson to learn…use it to your advantage. The negative words and actions from others will not make you stronger, but recognizing that jealousy, enviousness, and strife against you is real, and knowing what to do and say will. Having the right forethought and discernment to dismantle them at the right time, allows you to walk through the right door, closing it on all who oppose you, and those who are not with you.